


I want your hot love (and emotion)

by Squeaky



Series: The Soulmate Series (no one asked for) [6]
Category: Agent Carter (TV), Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Alpha Bucky Barnes, Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - No Powers, Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Angst and Humor, Apologies to the NYPD for probably butchering their internal processes, Because A/B/O, Beta Steve Rogers, Bucky talks dirty during sex, Dirty Talk, F/M, I probably should've tagged that before, I'm not kidding there is a lot of sex, Implied Mpreg, M/M, Mating Bond, Mildly Dubious Consent, OTP: Till the End of the Line, Porn With Plot, Sex, Smut, Soulmates, The Author Regrets Nothing, like a lot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-06
Updated: 2018-08-06
Packaged: 2019-06-22 22:15:07
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 18,352
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15591912
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Squeaky/pseuds/Squeaky
Summary: In a world where Alphas are dominant and Omegas are coveted, Betas are truly the third sex. Expected to be willowy and delicate, they're also considered artistic and flighty, everything that Steve Rogers is not. He's too big and too ungainly, and enjoys his work as an ED nurse far too much to be a socially-acceptable Beta. He's dated Omegas all his life, but what he secretly wants is to be bonded to an Alpha, even though he's sure Alphas would never be attracted to a Beta like him.Annoyed at his self-perception, his best friend and Alpha Peggy Carter, takes him to an Alpha bar in an attempt to prove him wrong. When one of the patrons goes into an accidental rut, Steve is the only one who can step up to help.Bucky is definitely an Alpha, definitely in rut, and definitely the most gorgeous man that Steve has ever seen. Steve knows that taking him home to keep him safe might be risky, but he doesn't expect to go into a sympathetic heat from the Alpha's pheromones. Nor can he possibly expect the bond mark that he wakes up with in the morning...





	I want your hot love (and emotion)

**Author's Note:**

> This story would 100% not exist without the incredible hand-holding, cheering and patience from my BFF [ Taste_is_Sweet ](http://archiveofourown.org/users/Taste_is_Sweet/pseuds/Taste_is_Sweet). She helped me figure out how this damn A/B/O universe could work and solved every other plot problem I threw at her, all with grace and a great sense of humour. She is the absolute best. 
> 
> The title is once again borrowed from the rather lovely [ Hold On, We're Going Home](https://youtu.be/GxgqpCdOKak) by Drake. The video is truly awful, but the lyrics are deceptively sweet.
> 
> This is the sixth story in my abuse-of-tropes Stucky soulmate series, however I freely admit that there is no mention of soulmates, soulmate-identifying marks, or soulbonds in this one at all. But bonding is bonding, right? Right? Anyway, I hope you like it.
> 
> * * *

Steve Rogers looked at his friend, Peggy Carter, out of the corner of his eye. “I’m not sure I should be here.”

Peggy looked back at him and her mouth tightened in annoyance. “We are going out to have a drink to celebrate the end of a very long week saving lives and you’re worried about what bar you can go to?”

“It’s an Alpha bar!”

Peggy’s annoyed expression didn’t change. “And you’re a Beta. I still fail to see the problem.”

Steve sighed. He knew she knew precisely why he was reluctant to go into the bar. This was the type of place that literally reeked of ‘Alphas only.’ But he also knew Peggy really well, and once she had her mind set on something, it would take hell and high water to move her.

Dutifully, he followed her through the door. Inside, it was full of heavy, dark furniture and darker lighting with two ancient pool tables near the back and several neon signs advertising beer brands hung up over the bar. The place smelled of old beer, greasy food and the unmistakable scent of too many Alphas packed into too small a space. Steve’s nose wrinkled.

“Its not an Alpha bar,” Peggy said as she led him to an unoccupied table near one of the walls. Peggy was a former soldier with the Royal Marines before she became a doctor, so she always ensured a good view of any room she was in. She gestured towards the bar where a young woman was preparing drinks. She had strawberry blond hair done up in a style reminiscent of the forties, and even though she was thin, she still had the unmistakably curvy figure of a female Omega. Her faint, flowery scent was just detectable over the strong, spicy smell of all the Alphas around them. “There are Omegas here.”

“One Omega doesn’t count,” Steve said, but his attention was distracted by a male Alpha who was sitting alone at the bar.  He was tall, with dark brown hair clipped short and a clean-shaven face that showed his strong jaw. He had broad shoulders and was obviously fit with an ease of movement that made it clear he was very comfortable in his own skin. He was also ridiculously handsome, with even features, wide, sharp cheekbones and blue eyes luminescent enough to show even in the poor lighting. His mouth was sensual and well-formed and looked like it was made for biting, and for a second Steve imaged that the man was his Alpha, and those succulent lips were clamped down around his scent gland, biting hard enough to break the skin. He shook his head to clear the image. He was a Beta, not an Omega. Alphas didn’t go for his type.

Which reminded him. “I’m a Beta,” he told Peggy, again. “Alphas don’t like my kind.”

Peggy’s frown deepened. “Alphas feel nothing of the sort. I’m an Alpha and you’re my best friend. This ‘Alphas don’t like Betas’ is bullshit.”

“So why is everyone looking at me like they want to kill me?”

“They’re looking at you because they want to fuck you,” Peggy said sweetly. “Besides, you look like an Alpha yourself.”

“I don’t smell like one!”

“Do you want me to rub myself all over you?” She asked sharply. “No? Good. I’m going to order us some drinks.” So, saying, she waved down the server.

The Omega came over, flashing a flirty smile at them both. Her smile slipped slightly when she looked at Steve, obviously catching his scent, but she immediately adjusted. ‘What can I getcha?” Her accent was pure Queens.

“A Budweiser for the gentleman and a Gibson for me, if you please.” Peggy gave the server a wink and she blushed, licking her lips. Steve couldn’t blame her, Peggy was both gorgeous and commanding in a way that screamed ‘dominant Alpha!’ If they hadn’t been such good friends, he’d have been on his knees for her years before.

They’d met when he’d first started working in the ED of _Maria Stark Memorial._ She’d been a new resident emergentologist and he’d been fresh out of nursing school. They’d bonded over their mutual inexperience, her with the United States and him with his job, and that bond had developed into a friendship close as siblings.

Although he still wasn’t sure why she’d chosen this bar.

“So, why this bar?” He asked after the server had left, an extra swing in her hips that was purely for Peggy’s benefit.

“This is where a lot of Alphas go for drinks after shift,” Peggy said. “And you’re always complaining that you never get to meet any single Alphas…”

“You’re trying to set me up?” Steve said, incredulous. “Peggy, you know I only date Omegas.”

She rolled her eyes. “Because you think that Alphas aren’t attracted to you. Which couldn’t be further from the truth.”

“It is true, and you know it!” Steve said, voice low. “You said it yourself, I look like an Alpha. That’s not what Alphas go for.”

“Not everyone prefers stereotypical Betas.”

“Right,” Steve said sarcastically. “Because their willowy frames and delicate features are so unattractive.”

“You have delicate features, and your frame would be willowy if you weren’t so strong.”

Steve looked at her. “My features are not delicate.”

“But you must admit you’re very pretty.” Peggy grinned at him.

It was Steve’s turn to roll his eyes. “I think pretty’s a bit of a stretch. I’m passably good-looking at best.”

“Then why is that Alpha staring at you?”

Steve shot his gaze in the direction that Peggy was looking. It was the Alpha he’d noticed before, the one standing at the bar. He was staring at Steve, his gaze appreciative. Steve felt his face heat under the Alpha’s scrutiny. He dropped his gaze but then looked back, not being able to help the blatantly flirty gesture. The Alpha grinned at him and took a long pull from his bottle, their eyes locked.

Peggy nudged him. “You should go talk to him.”

Steve shook his head. “He’s just flirting. It doesn’t mean anything. Alphas always flirt, they can’t help it.”

Peggy scowled at him. “Alphas only flirt if they mean it.”

“You were flirting with the server.”

“Because she was very pretty,” Peggy said primly. “And since I am neither blind nor dead, I noticed. And here she comes now.”

“Here ya go, honey,” the server said to Peggy with a wide smile as she handed her the Vodka and vermouth mixture with three pearl onions in a Martini glass. It looked far too sophisticated for their environment, but then again Peggy tended to make people want to go that extra mile. The server smiled sexily at Peggy one more time before plonking Steve’s drink in front of him with the barest hint of upturned lips. Steve sighed and took a long pull of his beer. He wasn’t that fond of Bud but he doubted that this place had very many craft beers on tap, plus everyone knew that Alphas were the ones that ordered. He loved Peggy like a sister, but she still hadn’t realized that, despite being American, he didn’t really like American beer.

“Here’s to days off!!” Peggy said cheerily as she raised her glass.

“Days off!” Steve repeated, gently knocking his bottle against the rim of her glass before taking another drink. He knew that he should feel happier about being out with his friend and having four whole days off in a row to look forward to, but he couldn’t help but feel sorry for himself. Betas, with their ability to both get pregnant and impregnate their partners, were viewed very differently from the other sexes. Despite Peggy’s confidence in the matter, Steve was pretty sure that none of the Alphas in the bar would be interested in him. Alphas, with their swaggering confidence and overt dominance were the preferred life mates of Omegas. Thanks to the Omegas’ rights movement, the stereotype of Omegas being sweet, submissive homemakers had finally dropped to the wayside, allowing for Omegas to take their rightful place in society. However, it didn’t change the fact that most Alphas still wanted to marry Omegas. Betas were definitely the third sex; stereotyped as being somewhat androgynous, artistic and flighty, they were thought to flourish in the arts as dancers and singers, painters and poets. Like a lot of Betas, he was naturally talented at visual arts, but he’d chosen the absolutely not-flighty job as a nurse instead.   

Steve glanced over at the flirty Alpha, only to see that he was frowning in confusion. He wiped his hand across his forehead as if he were hot before picking up his beer to take a long swig, head tilted back. Steve allowed himself to admire the column of the man’s throat, and the way his Adam’s apple bobbed as he swallowed. It made Steve’s mouth go dry and he fumbled for his own drink, never taking his eyes off the Alpha. The Alpha finished his beer, which caused his frown to deepen and he signaled to the Omega bartender to get him another.

She was looking at him with a concerned expression, her nose wrinkled delicately as if she was smelling something strong. She said something to him that obviously caught the man by surprise. He stood up abruptly and stalked towards the bathroom, walking close enough to their table that Steve could see the glistening of sweat at his temples.

The faint scent of something smoky and slightly sharp wafted behind him, along with the first vestiges of something headier and almost instantly intoxicating.

Steve wasn’t the only one to smell it. He felt Peggy bristle beside him and saw how a ripple went through the other Alphas populating the bar. The gorgeous Alpha was going into rut, right that minute, in the middle of a bar full of other Alphas.

“Oh shit,” Steve breathed.

“He should’ve left,” Peggy said grimly. She was clenching and unclenching her hands on the table, an unconscious reaction to the smell of the Alpha’s rut.

It made sense. The pheromones released when an Alpha went into rut, or an Omega went into heat, were powerful and infectious almost like a disease. One Alpha going into rut would cause a chain reaction in the other Alphas in the bar causing them at minimum, a strong feeling of irritation. However, in those Alphas with less self-control, that feeling of irritation could easily morph into aggression and an almost feral need to protect what they saw as ‘their’ territory and whatever Omega happened to be in it. The Alpha patrons of this bar seemed more inclined to the latter rather than the former; unless that Alpha left immediately, there was going to be a fight.

Peggy glanced over at the Omega at the bar who was now looking distinctly uncomfortable and obviously unsure of what to do. “This is going to get ugly,” Peggy said, voicing Steve’s thoughts. She stood. “I’m going to go back there and see if I can get him out of here. If you don’t hear from me in ten minutes—”

“That’s a terrible idea,” Steve cut her off. Peggy was incredibly brave, but normally she wasn’t this stupid. Even though she was strong and had been a British Marine, Steve doubted that even she’d be capable of subduing the man should his rut cause him to turn violent. His pheromones were probably clouding her judgement. “I’m going to go help him.”

“But—!”

“You’re an Alpha!” Steve interrupted again. “He’ll attack you!”

Peggy looked like she wanted to protest, but then nodded. “You’re right. He probably won’t attack you since you’re a Beta. I’m going to talk to the bartender and see if we can come up with a plan for getting everyone through this unscathed.” They both stood.

“I’ve got my phone,” Steve said. “I’ll text you.” The _if I need help_ went unsaid.  

Peggy nodded again, mouth thin. “His scent is very strong. Get him out fast as you can.”

“Will do,” Steve agreed. He took off to the bathroom at a run.

* * *

The scent of rut hit Steve head-on as soon as he entered the bathroom, strong enough that Steve had to stop and take a few calming breaths to get himself under control. As an ED nurse, he’d dealt with a lot of patients who had gone into heat unexpectedly, hadn’t had a readily-available partner, and ended up suffering various forms of heat/rut syndrome. A terrible state where the drive to _breed right now!_ overrode all other cognitive functions, and usually resulted in the poor Alpha or Omega ending up in terrible physical and emotional discomfort. The individuals usually arrived just _reeking_ of rut or heat, both of which were attractive to Betas, and Steve had learned back in nursing school how to get his own animalistic instincts under control in order to help his patients medically.

But there was something different about the way this Alpha smelled. Something rich and warm that Steve just wanted to breath in. It was like being by a campfire at night; Steve could smell his smoky fragrance, tinged with the tang of pine and the clean scent of fresh water. It made Steve feel paradoxically like curling up next to the Alpha and stripping naked at exactly the same time. It was a very hard scent to resist.

Using every ounce of his self-control, Steve went further into the room. The Alpha was readily visible where he was pacing in front of the sinks, hands in his hair. He’d already undone the top two buttons of his shirt, which showed damp patches on the chest and under the arms. His face was glistening with sweat. His head lifted as soon as Steve walked in.

“You shouldn’t be in here.”

There was _Command_ in his tone, and Steve just managed to hold back a whimper. Alphas in rut could speak with a frequency that was very hard for receptive Betas and Omegas to resist. Apparently, Steve was susceptible. He swallowed.

“I’m a nurse,” Steve said, trying to sound as professional as possible when all he wanted to do was press up against the Alpha and rub himself all over him. “I know that you’ve gone into rut, and I want to help you.”

The man’s lips twitched up in a smile that looked more like a grimace. “You gonna drop your pants for me, Beta? Because that’s the only thing that’s gonna help right now.”

Steve felt his hands twitch towards his fly almost without his volition. He cleared his throat. “I’m not sure that would be appropriate.”

The man smirked, a pained flash of teeth before he turned and continued pacing, every line of his body taught with tension. There was a streak of sweat soaking through the thin cloth on the back of his white shirt.

It was one of the sexiest things Steve had ever seen.

He shook his head, trying hard to get himself back under control. He’d never reacted this strongly to someone in rut. _Never._ He cleared his throat. “Is there someone I could call for you?”

“My sister,” the Alpha said, then shook his head emphatically. “No. She’ll want to come here. I can’t call.”

“But she could come get you. Get you somewhere safe,” Steve tried. “Let me—"

“ _No!_ ” The Alpha snarled. “She’s on shift. She won’t come alone. No one else can know about this. No one!”

The vehemence in his tone was surprising. “Rut is normal,” Steve said, trying to sound soothing, “and everyone gets caught by surprise every once in a while—”

“I’m a fucking _adult_!” the man hissed. “I should’ve _known!_ ”

“Sometimes the early signs are hard to notice,” Steve said in the same soothing tone. “It’s nothing to be ashamed of. Let me call her. Or maybe an ambulance?” He pulled out his phone and keyed in 9-1-1.

The guy saw what he was doing “No. No! Do not do that!!” Before Steve could move the guy was crowding into his personal space and had wrenched his phone out of his hand.

“Okay, okay.” Steve put up his hands placatingly. They were so close together that his fingertips brushed the man’s chest. He could feel the heat emanating from him. This close his tangy, smoky scent was nearly overwhelming. “It’s okay. No ambulance.”

The guy wasn’t listening. “God, you smell great.” Suddenly Steve was pressed up against him, fused from chest to hip. Dimly he heard the sound of his phone clattering to the floor right before the man’s hand went to the back of his head, tangling in his hair and pulling back, exposing Steve’s neck. Then the man’s lips were moving against the sensitive skin of Steve’s throat, sending shivers of pleasure directly to Steve’s cock. “I wanna fuck you,” The guy mouthed against his neck. He was rocking his erect penis on Steve’s thigh as he spoke. “I wanna take you into one of those stalls and bury myself so deep in your gape that you can feel my balls against your ass. I wanna jack you off while I thrust inside you, until you’re shooting cum like a fucking porn star. I wanna—”

“Hold on, hold on,” Steve gulped. He was trying not to throw his arms around the guy’s shoulders, but his knees were buckling under the force of his desire. Steve normally hated the term ‘gape’ for a Beta’s arrugia, but right now he couldn’t care. He could feel moisture collecting around his opening, like it was gaping just like the Alpha had said. His prick was straining against the zipper of his jeans, painfully erect. “We shouldn’t be doing this. You don’t want to do this. I really need to call an ambulance.”

“You’re right. You’re right,” the guy said. He licked a hot stripe up Steve’s neck. “Fuck, you taste good.”

Steve felt his eyes flutter shut with the intensity of the arousal the man was inspiring. His prick was so hard it was aching, the opening of his arrugia wet and sore from how turned on he was. “No,” Steve said weakly. “Please don’t do this. I don’t want to do something we’ll regret.”

“Fuck, yeah. Fuck!” The guy said and pushed Steve away just hard enough to get some distance between them. He ran his hands through his hair, and then did it again before turning to Steve. His blue eyes were clouded with lust, his expression haunted. “Please, keep away from me. You’re so hot and you smell—I don’t want to force you.”

Steve picked up his phone from the floor and then took a step further back. Every molecule of his body was screaming for him to get naked and let this man fuck him just as he’d described. This guy’s pheromones had to be extremely powerful because Steve had never felt this turned on in his life. “Let me call an ambulance,” Steve repeated. “They can get you to a hospital. Get you some help. Let me—”

“No!” the guy said again. “I can’t go to hospital. They’ll ask too many questions. They’ll know it was my fault. They’ll tell…” He shook his head as if trying to clear it.

“Your fault?” Steve repeated. “How—?”

“I forgot my pills, okay?” The Alpha spat. “I lost track and forgot a couple doses and _bam!_ ” He ran his hands through his hair again, now damp with sweat. “And now work’s gonna find out, and they’ll _know._ And then I’ll be put behind a _desk_ and then…” He broke off, his gaze meeting Steve’s. His eyes were nearly liquid with despair. “Please, just help me get somewhere safe. Somewhere where I won’t hurt anyone. I don’t want to hurt anyone.”

Steve’s heart broke. “Yeah, okay. I’ll help you.” He didn’t have a clue where he could take the man, especially if a hospital was out of the question. But even if he didn’t know, Peggy would. He keyed on his phone to call her, only to see that she’d sent him a ton of texts, each one terser than the last.

 **You have to get him out of there.** She wrote. **His scent is everywhere and the other Alphas are getting very agitated. At this point he’s not going to leave without a fight.**

Steve felt his stomach clench. There had been at least fifteen Alphas in the bar when he and Peggy had come in. If they all decided they wanted a piece of the Alpha now in rut… “We have to leave. Now.”

“Yeah, okay.” The guy grabbed Steve’s hand and pulled him into the corridor that led from the bar to the bathrooms. “This way.” He pulled Steve behind him, away from the bar area through the kitchen and then out into the alley way that ran behind the building. The cool night air was incredibly refreshing after all the pheromones in the bathroom, and Steve sucked in a deep breath. “Now what?”

“We get a taxi and go…” Steve paused. Where could they go that wasn’t a hospital where an Alpha in rut with no partner could be safe. “Your place?”

The guy was shaking his head before Steve had even finished. “My roommate’s shift went later than mine. We were going to meet. If I’m not here she’ll just go home, and she can’t be home with me like this. She’s an Omega. I don’t want—”

“Of course not,” Steve said quickly, shoving down the flare of disappointment to realize that the guy already had a partner. Then what he said sank in. “Wait, if you’re partner’s an Omega, why wouldn’t you just go to her for this?” He waved his hand to indicate his state.

“Not my partner!” The man hissed. “My sister! Foster sister,” he clarified at Steve’s horrified look. Even Alphas in the worst type of rut would never try to mate with a sibling, but a foster sibling wouldn’t register with ‘family’ hormones. It made total sense that the man wouldn’t want to go home.

“Let me call her,” Steve tried again. “Maybe she can find somewhere else to go—”

“No!” the Alpha shouted. “She’ll _come here_ , and then _I could hurt her!_   _I do not want her near me right now!”_

“Alright, alright, I hear you.” Steve said appeasingly. He gave up on the idea of calling the man’s sibling, but that meant he was out of ideas of where to take him. He bit his lip. The man couldn’t go to Peggy’s place. No matter how much self-control Peggy had, taking another Alpha who also happened to be in rut to her apartment would not go well. That left only one place to go. “I’m taking you to my place,” Steve said decisively. “I’m the only one who lives there. I’ll put you in my bedroom and close the door. You’ll be safe until your rut wears off.”

The guy blinked. “You’re taking me to your place?”

“Unless you’d prefer a hospital?”

“No. Your place is fine,” he said quickly. “Just. Just make sure when you put me in your bedroom, you lock the door. Because your whole place is gonna smell like you, and I don’t think I’ll be able to control myself.” The look he gave Steve was smoldering.

Steve swallowed. “Okay,” he said faintly. He gestured towards the main street where they could flag down a taxi. “I’ll definitely keep that in mind.”

* * *

Like all public transit, the air in the taxi had been heavily-filtered to keep odours at a minimum. Steve had therefore been able to keep his composure on the short ride back to his apartment, despite the Alpha and his intoxicating scent pressed hip to knee beside him. The man had been silent the entire ride, keeping his eyes closed and his forehead pressed against the window, the jittering of his leg the only indication of his distress. Steve had watched, mesmerized, as a drop of sweat had traced a path from the man’s hairline down the side of his neck. He licked his lips, then realized what he’d done and forced himself to look away.

He distracted himself by having a short text conversation with Peggy. He could tell by her response that she wasn’t pleased, but she understood his decision to help keep the Alpha safe. He promised he’d contact her in the morning.

“Bet you’re glad to be getting this one home, huh?” The Omega taxi driver smirked as Steve handed him a handful of bills and bustled the Alpha out the cab and onto the sidewalk. Steve ignored the driver’s leer and shut the door in his face, not willing to wait for his change.

The man’s sleeve was wet under Steve’s hand as Steve led him through the building’s front doors and then up the three flights of stairs to his one-bedroom. Steve fumbled the door open and practically shoved the man inside. His smoky, clean scent had only gotten stronger since they’d first met in the bar bathroom and Steve was finding it harder and harder to not just allow himself to fall under its spell.

“My bedroom’s over there,” Steve gasped, pointing towards the short hallway that led away from the living area.

“Oh, thank God,” the man breathed, and suddenly Steve found himself being bodily moved into his bedroom. He was on his back on his bed between one breath and the next. The Alpha’s big body was covering his, heavy enough to feel really good, but he was still holding his own weight, keeping Steve from being trapped and helpless.

Although the idea of being helpless under the Alpha; both of them naked and knotted together was one of the hottest things that Steve could imagine.

“Condoms,” the Alpha mouthed against Steve’s neck, his teeth scraping Steve’s skin and sending shocks of pure pleasure right to his prick. “Need to get one on.”

The idea of putting a layer of plastic between himself and the Alpha made Steve whimper in distress, but then his words penetrated the fog of lust in Steve’s brain and he realized what was happening.  “Wait,” he gasped.

The man threw himself off of Steve and ended up standing against the bedroom wall. He carded his fingers through his hair, his hands visibly shaking. “You’re right, you’re right,” he said, voice rough, “you’re meant to just lock me in here. Walk away.” He met Steve’s gaze as he spoke, his blue eyes glazed with lust.

Steve sat up, wincing as even that small movement caused the hard ridge of his prick to hit against the zipper of his jeans. He was so turned on it was almost painful. All he wanted to do was rip off their clothes and let the Alpha fuck him until he couldn’t stand. _Would that be so bad?_ A small voice in his head asked. He shook the voice away. The Alpha was obviously deep in rut, which automatically meant he couldn’t think straight, and Steve knew the rut pheromones were affecting his cognition. Even if he and the Alpha wanted it now, they could feel very, very different when the rut finally wore off.

He had to show some restraint.

“Yeah,” Steve said. “Yeah. I’ll go.” He stood.

“Okay, okay,” the guy said. He turned away from Steve, hands in his hair. “But you need to leave now. Because you smell amazing and you look amazing and the things I want to do to you…”

The man’s white shirt was translucent from the guy’s sweat, and it showed off every sculpted ridge of muscle. Whomever this Alpha was, he certainly kept good care of himself. He was honestly the best-looking Alpha that Steve had ever seen. _He thinks I look amazing._ Steve thought, and hadn’t he been complaining about that very thing earlier with Peggy? That he wasn’t the type of Beta that Alphas found attractive? But here this gorgeous Alpha was, standing in Steve’s bedroom, wanting to fuck. And Steve was saying no.

He couldn’t for the life of him figure out why he was saying no.

 _Restraint!_ He reminded himself, but just then the Alpha turned, his scent wafting from him as he moved; appealing as a warm fire on a cold night.

The man swallowed and licked his lips, a quick dart of his tongue that immediately attracted all of Steve’s attention. “I want you,” he said hoarsely. “And I’m doing my best to keep from using Command on you to make you want me, too. But if you don’t leave—”

“Do it,” Steve said. “Command me.”

The man squeezed his eyes shut before opening them again. They were wild and blown wide with desire. “Don’t do that. Not if you don’t mean it. Because I can’t—”

Steve pulled his T-shirt off over his head in one fluid movement. His heart was pounding. The crotch of his jeans was damp from his arousal. “Do it,” he repeated. He swallowed. “Alpha.”

The man’s eyes widened with the realization of Steve’s surrender. He let out a low growl and suddenly Steve found himself on his back again, pressed down by the Alpha’s weight, but this time the Alpha wasn’t trying to be polite. “Get your clothes off,” the Alpha purred. His hands were all over Steve’s chest, every touch like fire.

Steve managed to wiggle out of his jeans, boxers and socks without breaking contact with the Alpha, who was still touching him like he had to memorize every inch of Steve’s skin with his hands. The room was instantly perfumed with the bright, heady scent of Steve’s arousal, mixed in with the smoky musk of the Alpha.

“Oh my God,” the Alpha muttered. “You’re fucking gorgeous.” He sat back just long enough to remove his shirt, popping several buttons in the process, before he dropped it to the floor. “And your smell! It’s like peaches in the sun.”

Steve’s face heated from the praise. He’d never been called gorgeous before, and certainly not by an Alpha. He’d never had his scent compared to ripe fruit, either. He opened his mouth to argue, but the Alpha took that as an invitation to kiss him and suddenly his lips were covering Steve’s, tender and demanding all at once. The Alpha’s mouth was moist and tasted faintly of sweat and something sweeter, reminiscent of brown sugar. Steve moaned and the Alpha slipped his tongue inside Steve’s parted lips.

It was like an explosion of pleasure, and Steve bucked his hips against the Alpha’s groin. His prick scraped against the cloth of the Alpha’s pants, sending further shocks of sensation through him. He whimpered.

“You like that, do you?” The Alpha smirked, his lips barely ghosting against Steve’s. “Makes you all hot and bothered, huh? Bet you want more of me in you. More than my tongue, don’t you? You fucking gorgeous Beta. Bet your gape is soaked for me.”

“Arrugia,” Steve gasped. “I prefer arrugia to gape. More anatomically correct.”

“Sure, sure, sorry,” the Alpha said before grinning wickedly. “Bet you taste good there, too.” His head lowered and then his sensual mouth found Steve’s opening, his tongue lapping along the edges of Steve’s arrugia like it was ice cream. Steve couldn’t help the bucking of his hips, or the keening noise that was torn from his throat. “Like that, huh?” the Alpha smirked at him from between his legs. His mouth was glossy with Steve’s slick. He dove again, this time penetrating deeply with his tongue. Steve moaned, fisting the bedsheets. He couldn’t help the thrusting movements of his hips as his whole body cried for more.

“Hold still,” the Alpha said in his _Command_ voice, and Steve stopped moving but he was still shivering with want. “God, you’re sexy,” the man murmured, “such a sexy Beta. Wanna lick you all over.” So saying, he put his mouth directly on Steve’s prick, his hands weighing down on Steve’s thighs, trapping them against the bed.

Steve threw his forearm over his eyes, breath sobbing with the force of the sensations coursing through him. Steve knew from high school comparisons that his prick was as large as some smaller Alpha penises, and it was thicker than your average Beta’s, but the Alpha seemed to handle it with ease. Steve could feel the tip of his prick bobbing against the back of the man’s throat. He’d had Omegas suck him off before, but never with the intensity, with the _commitment_ that this Alpha was showing. It felt so good, nearly on the edge of painful. It was too much.

 “I’m gonna cum,” Steve panted. He could feel his balls tightening. “Alpha!”

The Alpha smiled up at him, mouth still wrapped around Steve’s prick, humming in obvious approval. The vibration went straight through him, and he was done.

Steve came, an explosion of pleasure that arched from the root of his sex throughout his body in wave after wave. His toes curled, his back arced off the bed. The sound that came out of his mouth was obscene.

The Alpha continued to suck his prick, nursing him through his orgasm until only aftershocks were left. Steve felt spent, like he’d just ran a marathon instead of receiving the best blow job of his entire life. “Alpha,” he panted. “Oh my God. Alpha.”

“I’m here,” the Alpha said. He moved up Steve’s body so that he could reach his face, stroking gently. The look he gave Steve was a mix of tenderness and pure possessiveness and it made Steve shudder as his body responded. _My Alpha,_ he thought. The scent glands at his neck throbbed with the primal need to be _taken._ He whined.

The Alpha sat back, his clothed hips straddling Steve’s naked groin. The front of the man’s pants were tented with his erection and dark with his pre-cum and the scent was driving Steve mad. Even though he’d just orgasmed, his arrugia was still throbbing, clearly wanting some attention of his own. He squirmed against the Alpha, searching for relief.

“You are so fucking beautiful,” the man breathed. His bare chest was glistening with sweat, the moisture beading in between his well-formed pecs and rolling slowly towards taught abs. Steve wanted to lick it and he surged forward.

The man caught his wrists and pressed him back against the bed. “No, Beta,” he said softly, _Command_ deep in his voice. Steve whimpered, and let himself lie still. He wanted the Alpha to fuck him. He wanted to be _ravaged_ by this man.

“Alpha.”

“I’m here,” the man repeated, mouthing over Steve’s scent glands. Steve moaned as pleasure deeper than anything he’d ever felt coursed through him. His arrugia and his glands were throbbing in unison. His prick, so recently spent, even twitched with renewed arousal. _I’m going into heat,_ he realized dimly. It shouldn’t have been happening, the Alpha might’ve been in rut, and he was coated in the Alpha’s scent, but they weren’t bonded. There was no reason why he should be having a sympathetic heat response with a man he’d just met.

The man picked up Steve’s wrist and brought it to his mouth, holding Steve’s gaze the entire time. He licked the secondary gland there, making him tremble. Then he bit.

Steve cried out, arching his back. It felt like he was orgasming again, only this time it was like his entire body had cum. The man continued to suck and lick over the shallow indent he’d made with his teeth, murmuring against Steve’s skin. “Jesus Christ. You’re so fucking responsive. What’re you gonna do when I’m balls deep inside you? You gonna scream for me? I bet you’ll scream.”

Steve’s whole body felt like it was on fire. The scent gland in his neck was aching. His arrugia was swollen and soaked with how turned on he was. Every breath he took was coated in the scent of the Alpha who was still over him, still wearing too many clothes. “Please, Alpha. Please.”

“Fuck,” the Alpha moaned. He raised himself up on his knees just high enough so that he could open his fly and push his pants down low enough so that his penis and balls were free. His erection was huge, showing how turned on this Alpha was. Steve took a moment to marvel at how much restraint the man had shown, right before he found himself flipped over on his stomach, thighs spread, his back covered by the weight of the Alpha. He felt the head of the Alpha’s penis press against the entrance of his arrugia. It felt hot and smooth and too large to possibly fit.  He stiffened at the sensation.

The man stopped. “What’s wrong?”

“I’ve—” Steve swallowed, suddenly loathe to admit the truth. “I’ve never done this before.”

He felt the Alpha’s forehead land on his shoulder. “Never?”

“Not…not this. I’ve been with Omegas but never an Alpha.” He swallowed again, as the realization hit him. “You’re my first.”

“Fuck.” The word was a hot breath against Steve’s back. “I’m your first.” The sentence was laced with both smugness and concern. He felt the Alpha’s muscles tighten, and his next sentence sounded like it was agony for him to even say out loud. “You want me to stop?” His penis pressed slightly further against Steve’s opening, like the Alpha’s body was desperately trying to change Steve’s mind.

Steve’s arrugia spasmed, slick leaking out between his legs as if Steve had already submitted. He could feel the Alpha trembling above him as he fought against his hormones. Unbelievably he’d held onto enough control to wait for Steve to decide. Even in the depths of his rut he was still trying to give Steve a choice. He hadn’t even used his _Command_ voice at all.

And Steve _wanted_ it _._ Wanted _him_ to be his first. He wanted this kind, strong and respectful Alpha to be his first. His only. His _Alpha._ He wanted to be completely and utterly taken by this man.

He wanted to bond.

“No, don’t stop Alpha! _Please!_ ” 

With one strong thrust, the Alpha pushed inside him, deep enough that he could feel it in his abdomen; feel the walls of his arrugia stretching against the penetration. It hurt for a moment, but then suddenly it really, really didn’t. His hips started moving of their own volition, trying to gain friction against the smooth hardness of the Alpha’s cock; trying to get him as deep as possible. He spread his legs wider.

The Alpha moaned and thrust harder, his chest sliding against Steve’s back, lubricated by the moisture of their sweat. “You feel…it’s…” the man stuttered. “You’re amazing. So hot and tight but big enough to take my cock all the way. You’re the best fuck I’ve ever had. So fucking sexy and beautiful. Can’t believe how lucky I am to be your first.” He thrust with every word, the movement creating a spiral of tension deep in Steve’s abdomen. He felt his prick hardening, pressing into the mattress.

“And sweet too,” the man continued. “Not just your smell, but you. You came to me in the bathroom. Looking like a fucking angel, wanting to help. Can’t believe how lucky I am.”

Steve blushed with the praise, feeling cared for and _loved_ in a way that no other partner had ever had. _It’s the rut,_ Steve reminded himself. Alphas didn’t go for Betas. Not under normal circumstances. But he couldn’t help but bask in the Alpha’s words.

The Alpha was still talking. “I saw you in the bar. So fucking hot. Thought you were bonded to that Alpha you were with though. But you’re not. Not if I’m your first.”

“No, not bonded,” Steve gasped. The tension in his abdomen was spiraling tighter, and Steve found himself thrusting backwards against the Alpha, looking for something to help ease the tightness inside him.

“You like that, huh?” The man chuckled against Steve’s ear. “Like me thrusting into you? Like how deep I am? I’m the first one you’ve ever had doing this. The only one.” He groaned, his hips snapping faster against Steve’s.

“Don’t want anyone else,” Steve moaned. It was true. He was totally gone for this Alpha. His scent, his kindness, the respect he’d shown, the perfect ridges of his body; his gorgeous face. He knew that what he was feeling wasn’t reciprocated, no matter how nice the Alpha’s words were. Rut was incredibly powerful and this Alpha was certainly deep in the throes of it. But Steve couldn’t help what he was feeling. His own heat was making him stupid, but he knew he wanted this Alpha for life.

“I want to bond.”

The Alpha’s thrusts came to an abrupt stop. “Bond?”

“Yes,” Steve panted, hips wiggling as he tried to get the delicious friction back. “I want to bond with you.”

The thrusting started again, and Steve groaned. “Yeah,” the man gasped. “Yeah, okay. That sounds good.” He mouthed around the scent gland on the side of Steve’s neck, licking and sucking the tender skin until Steve thought he was going to explode from want.

“Knot me,” Steve panted. “Knot me and bite me. Make me yours.”

“Fuck!” The Alpha shuddered over Steve, and suddenly Steve was alone on the bed, his body immediately chilled and his arrugia aching.

Steve rolled over, heart thudding painfully in his chest. “Alpha?”

The Alpha was standing at the edge of Steve’s bed. He’d shoved down his pants until he was fully, gloriously naked, as beautiful as if he’d been carved from marble. His penis was hard as marble itself, glistening with Steve’s slick. “If we’re doing this, it’s gonna be done right.” His voice was a deep growl that went right to Steve’s prick, which was once again totally erect. “I wanna look you in the eyes before I bite you. I wanna see the moment that you submit to me. I wanna hear you scream my name when we knot.”

“Okay,” Steve said faintly.

The man covered him again and was deep inside him a second later. Steve wrapped his legs around the Alpha’s back, feeling every thrust against the walls of his arrugia. He remembered the Omegas who had done this with him, and he wondered vaguely if it had felt nearly as good. His eyes fluttered closed.

“Look at me!” The Alpha _Commanded_ , and Steve’s eyes flew open. “My name is Bucky.”

“Bucky,” Steve breathed. It was perfect for him. “Bucky.”

“That’s right,” Bucky said. He thrust harder. “Say it again.”

“Bucky,” Steve moaned obediently. “Bucky!”

“What’s your name?” The man asked, voice wrecked.

“Steve,” Steve said, breathless.

“Fuck! Steve!” Bucky cried. He bit down. Steve felt Bucky’s teeth break the skin of his gland, barely enough to hurt and he whimpered in frustration. He wanted it _deeper_. He wanted Bucky to leave _marks_. He didn’t want a light nip like he was some delicate Omega.

But before he could say anything he felt Bucky thrust into him, hard and fast, and then tense with a sharp cry. He felt Bucky’s knot swell against the sensitive opening of his arrugia, and suddenly he was cumming, convulsing around the knot while his prick spurted ropes of semen against Bucky’s abdomen. Bucky’s teeth were still gripping his neck, and the combination of sensations was so intense that Steve saw stars. His brain went totally blank. He wasn’t sure he was even breathing.  

He felt Bucky shift them gently in the bed until they were on their sides, Steve’s head resting on Bucky’s bicep and their legs still tangled together. Steve could feel the knot inside him, warm and solid. Bucky licked over Steve’s scent gland, sending a gentle shiver through him. “Steve,” he said contentedly, like the name was something precious.

“Alpha,” Steve exhaled, curling his free arm around Bucky’s side and snuggling against his broad chest.

He felt Bucky’s chuckle against his forehead. “Beta,” his voice rumbled. “ _My_ Beta.” He moved the pillow so it was better positioned, and then kissed Steve’s temple before settling down. “Gonna take care of you,” he mumbled.

Steve sighed in contentment. He wiggled his hips slightly, still feeling the knot holding them together. Post-bonding endorphins were making him sleepy and he felt wonderfully content. He felt Bucky make a couple of lazy thrusts before kissing him gently on the lips.

“My beta,” he mumbled again.

“Yours,” Steve agreed. He yawned.

“Go sleep,” Bucky said like it wasn’t Steve’s apartment, or his bed. It sounded like a great idea anyway.

“’Kay,” Steve murmured. He closed his eyes.

* * *

Steve woke in the morning, feeling languid and more relaxed than he could remember. It felt great to sleep in, especially after the brutal shifts he and Peggy had worked that week. He sighed and stretched, noting the delicious soreness between his legs, and the lingering scent of campfire and pine.  

His contented mood vanished, replaced immediately by a sense of dread.

He’d bonded with an Alpha last night. A man he’d barely met who’d gone into rut in an Alpha bar, who went by the improbable name of Bucky. And he’d gone into sympathetic heat, which was something Betas usually only did with their bond mates, so it didn’t make sense that Steve would’ve responded so strongly. But he had, and then they’d knotted and bonded for real. 

And if the lack of scent was anything to go by, the Alpha had promptly left as soon as Steve had gone to sleep.

“Damn it!” Steve swore under his breath. He sat up, wincing as his pelvis let him know that he’d really knotted last night. Fuck, they’d knotted. And neither one of them had thought to use a condom. Steve scrubbed a hand over his face, his heart racing. He took a deep breath, then another, trying to get his pulse under control.

It wasn’t working. Each breath brought with it Bucky’s smoky smell, and a strong desire to roll himself in the sheets and coat himself even further in Bucky’s scent.

He stood and left the bedroom, anxiety coursing through him. The rest of the small apartment was empty. Steve’s laptop was still on the kitchen counter, the keys to his motorcycle were still on the small table by the door. It didn’t look like anything of value had been taken. _Except my heart._ Steve scowled at the thought. He barely knew Bucky! And other people had one-night stands all the time. Steve had just helped out an Alpha in trouble. It didn’t need to mean anything more than that. Except that he’d gone into sympathetic heat. Except for the fact they bonded.

“Damn it!” Steve swore again and went straight to the bathroom. He turned on the lights and stared at himself in the mirror, brow creased with concern over what he might find. He was still completely naked from the night before, and every mark Bucky had left was painfully visible against his pale skin. His mouth was red from their kissing, and there were light scrapes on his skin which must have been from Bucky’s stubble. There were streaks of dried cum on his abdomen and traces of slick between his thighs. He lifted his right wrist to look at the oval of teeth marks that Bucky had left over his secondary gland, the shallow indents dark pink but not deep enough to break the skin.

He stared at the marks for a long time, remembering the incredible sensation that had flooded his body when Bucky had bitten him. His prick twitched in response and he frowned.

He steeled himself, took a deep breath, and looked at his neck in the mirror.

“Oh shit.” Steve gingerly reached up to touch the scent gland that rested between the junction of his shoulder and throat on the left side of his neck.

There were bite marks there, deep and purple with bruising, and tender enough that Steve winced when he poked them. A few of the marks even had a small trickle of blood where the skin had been broken by Bucky’s teeth.

It was a perfect bond mark. Deep enough to scar but not deep enough to cause any kind of permanent injury. It was the type of mark that a caring Alpha would leave; demonstrating respect and possession all at once.

Steve was bonded to an Alpha who had left this kind of bond mark, and then disappeared without even saying goodbye.

“It’s because I’m a Beta,” Steve whispered to himself. Alphas didn’t want Betas as their bond mates. Bucky must have been really out of his head with rut to have even done it. He must have been horrified to wake up next to him that morning and realized what he’d done.

Steve put his head in his hands.

* * *

He called Peggy, and then spent the next hour and a half trying to make himself presentable and clean up his apartment.

He knew it was just bonding instinct, this intense drive he had to clean and tidy his place so that his Alpha would have a nice nest to return to, but even though he clenched his jaw until it hurt, he couldn’t seem to stop himself.

Angrily he straightened up the counter in the kitchen. There was a scrap of yellow paper by the fruit bowl, and Steve crumpled it up and threw it into the garbage with way more force than was necessary. It was quickly followed by three takeout containers and a broken pen and then the paper towel he used with the Windex that left everything shiny.

Then he cleaned and dusted the living room, even going so far as to drag out the vacuum and clean underneath all the couch cushions. He found Sam’s spare key and seventy-seven cents.

Next was changing the sheets on his bed, which required a lot of very shallow mouth breathing to prevent himself from bursting into tears. The whole bedroom smelled like cool water, burning wood and the tang of pine and every breath reminded Steve that he’d been rejected for being a Beta. He’d spend his life alone.

He’d just finished putting the last pillow in place when there was a knock on the door. Steve bounded over and threw it open without even checking through the peephole, every cell in his body hoping that Bucky would be on the other side.

It was Peggy. Of course, she noticed how his face fell before he could even fake a proper smile.

She brushed past him into the apartment. The scent of leather, glycerin soap and lemon followed in her wake. It was the smell of someone fiercely competent and very protective and just breathing in her scent made Steve feel safer and more in control. “You look like shite,” she said succinctly, “and you reek of Alpha.” Her brown eyes narrowed as she surveyed her surroundings, and Steve found himself sheepishly rubbing his new bond mark as he watched her.

Slowly she circled through the apartment, taking in the gleaming furniture and the total lack of clutter. Even his sketchbooks had been put away, and the coloured pencils placed neatly back in their box. She turned to him and gave him the same thorough once-over with her eyes. “Correction,” she said as she looked at him. “You don’t look like shite, you look fucked. And I do mean in the Biblical sense. Steve, what happened?”

He gestured to the couch. “We’d better sit down.” 

Peggy nodded and sat, her eyes soft with concern. “Your phone message this morning was rather cryptic, but I did get the impression that it had a fair bit to do with the Alpha you helped rescue last night.” She raised one perfectly-curved eyebrow. “I gather you may have helped quite a lot?”

Steve’s face immediately grew hot. “He was in rut.”

“And you had sex with him.” It wasn’t a question.

Steve nodded, face burning. He rubbed at his bond mark, taking small comfort in the slight ache from the bruising there. Of course, Peggy noticed. “Are you hurt?” Her eyes widened as she realized what it was. “Steve!”

“We may have bonded,” Steve mumbled. His face was on fire.

Peggy was peering at his bond mark with her medically-trained eyes. “It’s a clean bite,” she commented. “Well-formed, deep, and with a strong indication that he most likely caused a sympathetic hormonal release in you.” She sat back on her heels. “Steve, I don’t think that there’s any question of whether or not you’ve bonded. You most definitely have!”

“I know.” Steve’s voice broke on the word. “And then he left. Peggy, we bonded and then he left! And I have no idea how to find him!”

Peggy took Steve into her arms. “There, there,” she soothed. “It’s just been a few hours. I’m sure he’ll come back.”

“There was no note. He didn’t leave a note or anything!”

“He’ll come back,” Peggy repeated. “You mustn’t fret.”

“I don’t know his last name.” Steve wiped at his eyes. “He told me his name is Bucky, but he never told me his last name. I don’t know who he is.”

“I’m not sure that you know his real first name, either,” Peggy muttered. She patted Steve’s back. “But he knows where you live, so surely he’ll return?”

“He hasn’t so far.”

“But you’re bonded,” Peggy said rationally. “It won’t be comfortable for him to be away from you, either. I mean, the drive to consummate the bond…” Something must have shown on Steve’s face, because Peggy’s eyes narrowed again.  “Steve, did you already consummate your bond?”

Steve nodded miserably. “I went into heat.”

Her eyes widened. “Went into heat? _Before_ you bonded? That’s very unusual. It usually indicates that the bond will be extremely strong. Did you knot?”

He nodded again, unable to meet her eyes.

“Steve,” and now Peggy’s voice was hard. “Please tell me that you used protection.”

“I was in sympathetic heat.” Steve forced out a laugh. “Didn’t really think about it.”

“Didn’t _he?”_

“He did!” Steve said immediately, horrified at Peggy’s dark look. “He wanted to use one! But then…”

“But then _what?_ ”

Steve gave a one-shouldered shrug. “We got distracted?”

“Oh my God, and you a medical professional. We need to get you screened for STIs as soon as possible.”

“He was clean,” Steve said with more certainty than he felt. “He smelled clean?” he continued at Peggy’s censuring look.

She shook her head and stood to survey the room once again before turning back to him. “Are you pregnant?”

“What?” Steve squawked. “Pregnant? What do you mean, pregnant?”

“You went into heat, and then knotted with an Alpha in rut. Without protection. And now you’ve spent your whole morning cleaning house. And you smell…” She shook her head. “Well, you don’t smell like the way you normally do.”

“I took a shower,” Steve said defensively. “And you know that the urge to nest is common post-bond.”

“Especially if the bond recipient is pregnant,” Peggy said primely. Then her gaze softened. “Oh Steve, what are you going to do?”

Steve’s hands went to his abdomen. It felt the same as always, tight with hard-earned muscle with no indication if there was new life growing inside. He didn’t know how he felt about the idea. He’d always wanted to be a father, but he’d assumed he’d be the bond-giver with a sweet and gentle Omega as the bond-recipient. It never occurred to him that he’d be the one pregnant. Or that he’d end up parenting alone. He bit his lip, feeling tears prick against his eyelids. It was the second time he’d cried in the last fifteen minutes, and didn’t being pregnant make you more emotional? “I don’t know,” he said, voice cracking. “I just know I don’t want to be alone.”

“Oh darling,” Peggy said, pulling him into an embrace. Her head just cleared his shoulder. “He’ll come back.”

“He won’t,” Steve finally voiced the fear that had been with him since that morning. “I’m a Beta. No Alpha in their right mind wants a Beta. Especially one who looks like me! He’s not coming back for me. He won’t!”

Peggy moved away far enough that she could look him in the eyes. “That is absolute bollocks and you know it.”

“But he left,” Steve said mournfully. “We bonded last night, but he still left. If it’s not because I’m a Beta, then why did he leave?”

Peggy’s brow creased. “Are you sure he didn’t leave a note?”

Steve nodded miserably. “He doesn’t want me, Peggy,” he said softly. “Bond or no bond. He doesn’t want me.”

“Nonsense,” Peggy said. “Any Alpha would be lucky to have you as their bond mate. He will return. I’m sure of it.”

Steve sighed, knowing that it would be useless to argue further. She didn’t believe what Steve knew to be the truth; Alphas didn’t bond with Betas, and especially overly-large, ungainly Betas like him. But even though Steve had known this his whole life, the truth still hurt. He held Peggy tightly and breathed in her soothing scent. _Bucky_. He thought. “Yeah, for sure he will,” he said. He wished it could be true.

* * *

“Any word?”

Steve looked up from his charting to meet Peggy’s gaze. He shook his head.

“Bloody hell,” she muttered. “How long has it been, then?”

“Four days. The whole time I’ve been off.” He touched his bond mark as he spoke. The skin was barely tender.

“I’m so sorry,” she said, and Steve swallowed hard against the rush of tears her sympathetic expression produced.

“It’s just hard, you know? These scrubs don’t do anything to hide it at all, so everyone keeps asking me about it. And congratulating me on my bond. And asking when we’re going to have pups!” He smiled miserably. “I don’t know what to tell them.”

“You don’t have to tell them anything,” Peggy said in her decisive tone. “Your bond mark is nobody’s business but your own.”

He nodded but didn’t say anything, too unhappy to speak.

“Oh darling.” Peggy put her hand on the back of his neck. The secondary scent gland on her wrist perfumed the air with the smell of newly-cleaned leather, and Steve inhaled the warm Alpha scent. “I’m so sorry this is happening. But at least your STI tests were clean.”

“I got all my vaccines before nursing school,” Steve explained. “And the doctor gave me prophylactic antibiotics, just in case. I’m totally fine.” _Except for the fact I still might be pregnant._ The doctor who had treated him after his unprotected knotting had said it was too early to know if Steve was pregnant. And despite common belief, the subtle change in his scent that Peggy had noticed wasn’t really an indication either way. He had at least three weeks to go before he could be sure a pregnancy test would be accurate. He still hadn’t decided what he would do if he was.

 _Gonna take care of you_ , Bucky had said after they’d knotted, and Steve had been stupid enough to believe it. He closed his eyes against the wash of pain.

Peggy gave his neck a gentle squeeze. “Well, no risk of STIs is certainly one less thing to worry about. Everything will be fine. You’ll see.”  

Steve didn’t feel like he’d be fine. He might be accidentally pregnant and he’d been abandoned by his bond mate, both of which were exactly the opposite of ‘fine.’ But Peggy was trying to help in her own brusque way, the least he could do was let her cheer him up. “Sure.” Steve straightened his back, forcing himself to smile.

“Good lad.” Peggy patted his shoulder. “Now it’s time to stop moping and get back to work. We have patients.”

Steve stood up just in time to see two police officers enter through the ambulance doors. One was a short Omega with flaming red hair. Her right arm was held out in front of her, supported by her left. Her flowery scent was clouded with the smell of her distress and pain. There was blood dripping in a steady stream from an obvious injury on her forearm. The other officer was a tall, dark-haired, broad-shouldered Alpha. He was practically carrying the Omega into the ED with one strong arm wrapped around her waist as his other hand was helping to keep her injured arm elevated. There were signs of bruises forming around one of his piercing blue eyes and even though he was moving fast, Steve’s critical nursing eye could tell that he was guarding his left side. He smelled angry and frightened, and both scents were strong enough to nearly drown out the scents of smoke, water and pine that Steve would recognize for the rest of his life. His eyes grew wide.

“Isn’t that your Alpha?” Peggy sounded just as shocked as Steve felt.

“ _Bucky?_ ”

Bucky’s eyes snapped to his. A complex series of emotions flashed across his face; joy, anger, longing and hurt before he schooled his expression and indicted the Omega with his chin.

“My partner’s been injured,” he said unnecessarily.

Steve nodded and shook off his shock. He’d deal with his bond mate’s sudden reappearance later. Right now, he had a patient.

Peggy had found a wheelchair and maneuvered it behind the Omega so she could sit.

“Give it to James,” the Omega ground out through a jaw held tight. Her eyes were shiny with unshed tears and Steve could tell that it was taking all her strength just to hold herself together. “He’s hurt worse than me.”

“I’m fine. You take it.” Bucky said forcefully. Steve couldn’t help the tremor that passed through him. Bucky was using his _Command_ voice on the Omega, but it was Steve who was reacting.

“Sit, please,” Peggy said to her. She didn’t _Command_ the Omega, but her Alpha tone must have worked anyway because the officer sat without further complaint. “Well done,” Peggy continued as if the Omega had accomplished a great feat. “Now, officer…”

“Romanova,” Bucky growled.

“Call me Natasha,” the Omega said.

“Natasha,” Peggy repeated. She gently took Natasha’s injured arm in her gloved hands. “What seems to be the issue?” Blood was still trickling from the wound, dripping gently onto Natasha’s uniform pants.

“She got bit,” Bucky said. “The fucker was aiming for her glands.”

Peggy made a non-committal noise as she inspected the wound. It was definitely a bite mark, deep enough to have torn through the skin down to the fascia. One of the perpetrator’s canines just nicked the edge of the sensitive gland, which explained the Omega’s intense pain and distress. Whoever had done this to her had wanted it to feel very personal.

No wonder Bucky’s scent was bristling with anger. “We were called to a domestic. A Beta getting the shit beat outta him by his Omega partner. Tash and I go in to try to calm things down, and then they _both_ jump us! The Beta she was trying to help went right for her! Fucking Beta bastard!”

 “James is hurt, too,” Natasha said. “The Omega went for him. And you know how that is.”

Steve did. Instinct meant that Alphas wouldn’t hurt Omegas unless it was the direst of circumstances. Bucky probably would’ve taken a lot more hits than necessary before he’d felt able to properly fight back. No wonder he was bruised and limping.

“I need to take Natasha to our wound care room for stitches. Can you please find Sam and have him assess James for injuries?” It was clear that Peggy had heard Natasha call Bucky ‘James’ and had decided that Bucky wasn’t very much of a name at all. She was also doing him a huge favour by leaving him alone with his bond mate, but assigning another health care professional to Bucky’s care so that Steve wouldn’t have a conflict. Peggy was a great friend.

“Will do,” Steve nodded and Peggy wheeled Natasha off towards the far end of the ED. He turned to look at Bucky, who was staring at him, blue eyes tight with pain and fear for his partner.

Something _clicked_ in Steve’s brain; the way that Bucky was holding Natasha; his intense anger at the fact she’d been hurt; the way that they each tried to get the other help first; the fact that she called him by his real name and not some stupid nickname that he apparently gave to his unsuspecting sexual conquests; the fact that she was an Omega.

Natasha was Bucky’s partner, but not just his cop partner, his _life_ partner. Their bonding when Bucky was in rut was exactly what Steve had suspected it was, an accident of epic proportions.  

Bucky was bonded with Natasha. The fact he’d been so kind and respectful that night was because he was a police officer who was probably far too acquainted with what happened when ruts and heats went wrong.  His bond with Steve may have felt really good, but it was just a bite with no deeper meaning. They weren’t really bonded. At all. Steve’s hand automatically went to his abdomen, feeling horribly alone.  

Bucky was still looking at him, his gaze glazed with pain and shuttered with wariness, the edge of his right eye was swollen and purple from the Omega’s fist. “Hey Steve,” he smiled crookedly, looking adorable and incredibly sexy all at once. “It’s great to see you.”

Steve’s mouth hardened. “You never told me you’re a _cop_.” It turned out there were a lot of things the Alpha hadn’t told him.

Bucky’s smile slipped. “Is that a problem?”

“No, _James,_ it’s not.” Steve crossed his arms. “But not hearing from you for four days after we bonded kind of is.”

Bucky’s smile was immediately replaced by an expression of anger and hurt. “You never called me. _Steven._ ”

“Call you?” Steve’s mouth fell open. “How could I call—” He stopped and took a deep breath. “You know what? I’m not doing this now. You’re hurt and getting you assessed is my priority. Come on.” So saying, he took Bucky by his arm and started leading him towards one of the curtained off examination rooms with more gentleness than he felt. It was incredibly reminiscent of the night they’d first met, when Steve had led Bucky from the taxi to his apartment. He felt his prick twitch with the memory of that night and he scowled.

“You smell so good,” Bucky murmured. “I’ll never forget that smell. Peaches and sunshine. Good enough to eat. I’ve missed you.”

Steve ignored Bucky’s words, hurt and confusion clouding his thoughts. They weren’t really bonded, so why would Bucky bother to say shit like that? He pulled back the curtain of the room and helped Bucky get onto the bed. Bucky hissed as he moved, still guarding the left side of his body. He lay down gingerly, breath hitching.

“Your ribs?” Steve said sympathetically. He winced at Bucky’s nod, then helped remove his summer uniform shirt and the duty vest underneath. Steve eyed Bucky’s white undershirt dubiously. “I’ll have to pull it over your head.”

“Cut it off,” Bucky panted. “But leave my duty belt. Sergeant’ll come get it later.”

Steve nodded his understanding, and carefully cut off the white undershirt, being sure to pull it out from Bucky’s belt first. He dropped the ruined garment on the floor. He couldn’t hide his worried expression when he saw the ugly bruising forming over Bucky’s left side. “Is that a boot print?”

“Omega knocked me down and then the fucking Beta kicked me.” Bucky spat.

Steve nodded sympathetically. It made sense that Bucky would be a little salty with the fact that a Beta literally kicked him when he was down, but he couldn’t help but think about the way society viewed Betas; as untrustworthy and flighty. No wonder Bucky didn’t want him.

He shook off the thought and refocused on Bucky, inspecting his injuries to see how badly he was hurt. First, he checked the bruises on Bucky’s head, which seemed purely superficial, and then he palpated the darker ones on his side, trying to judge if the ribs were actually broken. Bucky grunted in pain, causing his pine scent to sharpen in response. Technically Steve shouldn’t be nursing his bond mate, but he was curious and concerned. Plus, everyone knew that you couldn’t be bonded with more than one person at a time, so Bucky wasn’t _really_ his bond mate, was he? Natasha obviously already had that privilege. Steve frowned.   

Bucky noticed. “How bad is it?” He clearly assumed Steve’s expression was about his ribs.

“I think they’re just bruised. I’m going to call one of our physician’s assistants to come look at you. His name’s Sam and he’s a friend of mine. He’ll probably order an X-ray or CT scan to be sure, but I’m pretty sure nothing’s broken. You should be fine in a couple of days.” Steve was very proud of how professional he sounded, when all he wanted to do was curl up in a corner and weep.

He pulled out the cordless phone issued by the ED for internal communication from a pocket in his scrubs and called Sam to let him know that he had a patient waiting. His report was swift and matter-of-fact with no details that would indicate that Bucky was anything to Steve but a patient. Which was exactly the way Steve wanted it. The less people who knew about his total humiliation, the better. He pocketed the phone.

Bucky was looking at him, blue-eyed gaze hooded and penetrating, and Steve suddenly realized he was alone in a room with his not-bond mate, who was shirtless, and despite the bruising, as gorgeous and sexy as Steve remembered. His hands made a small movement towards him, wanting to touch. He swallowed.

Bucky’s sensual mouth curled up in a small smile. He made a beckoning gesture with one hand. “C’mere.”

Steve’s arrugia pulsed in response. He was already damp and ready for his Alpha and all Bucky had done was _look_ at him. The thought made him mad.

“No,” Steve said. “I’m not playing this game anymore.”

Bucky’s smile disappeared. “What?”

“I’m not some convenient fuck!” Steve snarled.

“What?” Bucky said again. “Who the hell told you that?” He tried to sit up. “Ow! Goddamn.”

Steve was at his side in an instant, hands beneath his back to help. “Don’t. You’ll hurt yourself.”

“I’m much better now,” Bucky murmured. Gently he grasped both sides of Steve’s face and pulled him in for a kiss.

Steve didn’t stop him. He _couldn’t_. His whole body was immediately tingling with the contact. _My Alpha_ , he sighed contentedly.

Bucky must have sensed his surrender, because he deepened the kiss, sliding one hand around the back of Steve’s neck, his fingertips just brushing over Steve’s bond mark.

It was like the most erotic jolt of electricity, and Steve moaned into Bucky’s mouth, the front of his scrubs tightening as his prick responded.

Bucky’s other hand slid from his face and down his spine to cup Steve’s ass, pulling him further towards the bed. “My Beta,” Bucky whispered against Steve’s lips. “Want you. Want you on me. Your sexy mouth wrapped around my dick. Wanna feel my cock hit the back of your throat.”

Steve shuddered at the words, feeling his knees bending of their own accord to do exactly what his Alpha suggested. Bucky hadn’t _Commanded_ him, but apparently even mere suggestions from his bond mate were too powerful to resist.

Except Bucky wasn’t his bond mate. He was Natasha’s. Whatever they were doing, it wasn’t real. Steve stood and stepped back from Bucky in one movement.   

Bucky’s expression was a combination of confusion and lust. “Steve?”

“Don’t,” Steve said. His voice broke on the word and suddenly he was blinking back tears. “Just don’t.”

“Don’t what?” The crooked smile was back, it was totally endearing and totally hot and Steve wished he’d never, ever seen it. “Kiss my bond mate? I thought that’s what you were supposed to do.”

“We’re not bond mates.” Steve wiped his eyes, hoping that Bucky wouldn’t notice. “And I think that your _real_ bond mate might have a problem with what you’re doing. So, I’m going to go, and pretend that I never met you.” He pointed behind his shoulder towards the curtain with his thumbs.

“What?” Bucky’s expression hadn’t changed. “What the hell do you mean, real bond mate? What the fuck—” He tried to stand and broke off with a short, pained cry.

Steve automatically moved towards him when the curtain opened behind and Sam stepped in.

“Hey,” he said cheerily, then his face dropped as he took in the tension in the room. “Am I interrupting something?”

“Not at all,” Steve said with more enthusiasm than he felt. “I was just leaving anyway.” He turned to go but paused. “Take good care of him,” he said to Sam. Then he left.

And went straight to the employee washroom to cry out his broken heart.

* * *

“He was asking for you.”

Steve didn’t look up from where he was charting. “Aren’t you breaking patient confidentiality by telling me that?”

He could feel Sam’s unimpressed look. “He’s your bond mate. And I’m not happy you didn’t tell me you got bonded, by the way. I would’ve bought you a cheese tray.”

Steve’s mouth thinned. “I didn’t and he’s not.”

“Whoa. That’s a really harsh thing to say, Steve. Especially how I can see how he’s put a ring on it. You guys fighting?”

“It’s not harsh, it’s true.” Steve turned to look at Sam and fought the urge to touch the perfect oval of his bond mark. “He’s bonded to someone else. An Omega. I saw her.”

“He is?” Sam frowned. “Well, fuck.”

“I know,” Steve agreed miserably.

Sam shook his head. “Wait. I feel like I’m missing something here. How the hell did you get not-bonded to this guy, or whatever it is you’re calling it?”

“It’s a long story,” Steve sighed. But then dutifully he told Sam the whole thing, starting from first seeing Bucky at the Alpha bar, to waking up the next morning and being alone, to suddenly seeing Bucky in the ED after four days of no contact. Even though he left out all the explicit details, he could still feel his face burning as he told the tale. Sam wasn’t stupid, for sure his imagination would fill in the blanks.

“Damn,” Sam said when Steve was done. “That’s a hell of a story.”

“I know, right?” Steve agreed sadly. “I kind of thought we had something real going on.” He put his hand on his abdomen. He hadn’t quite mentioned the fact he might be pregnant to Sam. That was something he absolutely didn’t want to talk about. Not until he knew for sure.

Sam raised his eyebrows. “That’s the thing. Everything you’re describing? It sounds like you kind of _did_ have something real going on. Sympathetic heat isn’t really a thing without it. Why are you so sure that it’s not a real bond?”

 _Because I’m a Beta, and Alphas don’t want to bond with Betas._ It was on the tip of Steve’s tongue, but he didn’t say it out loud to Sam. Sam was a tall, muscular and handsome Alpha who smelled enticingly of tilled earth, newly-cut grass and cedar. He’d never be able to understand Steve’s problems. “Because he already has a bond mate,” Steve said instead. “Like I told you.”

“But how do you _know?_ ” Sam said, insistent. “Maybe they’re just really good friends, like you and Peggy.”

“Why don’t you ask her?” Steve stood and indicated the red-haired Omega who was making her way towards the nursing station. Natasha had a soft gauze bandage wrapped around her forearm and two pieces of paper in her hand, which most likely were discharge instructions for her wound and a prescription for antibiotics. She looked calmer and in way less pain than when Steve had first seen her. Her scent had returned to something light and flowery that reminded Steve pleasantly of lavender. “She’s right there.”

“Hi, boys,” Natasha said as she sauntered up, a small swing in her hips. Her gaze was attached to Sam’s, who seemed completely disinclined to break contact. She smiled at him, and then bit her lip in a blatantly flirtatious gesture.

Sam was clearly not indifferent. “Hello,” he practically purred, leaning on his forearms over the top of the station. “How can I help you?”

“I came in with a friend of mine? Officer James Barnes? Do you know where he might be?” Her green eyes were wide with a quintessential ‘I’m a helpless Omega’ expression, which Steve surmised she was anything but. Sam, the typical Alpha that he was, was obviously enchanted.

“He’s getting a CT scan done of his head and chest to make sure that we didn’t miss anything,” Sam said. “He should be done in a couple of hours. One of your sergeants is with him.”

“Oh good,” Natasha sighed in obvious relief that her bond mate was being well cared for, which Steve absolutely did _not_ frown at. “Can I go see him?”

Steve could practically see Sam melt into a puddle of goo as he responded to Natasha. It would’ve been both funny and charming to see a potential bond match form right before his eyes, except for the fact that Natasha was actually Bucky’s bond mate and shouldn’t have been flirting like this. At all.

But then again, her bond mate had had sex with Steve and then given him a bond mark, so maybe it was a thing they did. Somehow the idea didn’t make him any less angry.

“The CT scan uses radiation,” Steve cut off whatever inanity Sam was about to tell her. “So, you won’t be able to see your bond mate until he’s done.” He smiled coldly at her. _Take that._

She turned her green eyes on Steve, looking much less helpless than she had a moment ago. “Bond mate? Excuse _you_ , but I don’t have a bond mate.”

“Um,” Steve said in the same sarcastic tone. “I think that _James_ might disagree with you.”

Now her expression was one of complete revulsion and utter confusion. “You think _James_ is my bond mate? Oh my God. That’s totally disgusting. I think I just threw up in my mouth.”

Steve blinked, feeling like the ground had just shifted beneath him. “James isn’t your bond mate?”

“Of course not!” Natasha said with the same revolted expression. “He’s my brother!”

Sam shot Steve a look of absolute triumph.

Natasha was still looking at Steve, her gaze bouncing from his name tag to the bond mark on his neck and back again. Her eyes narrowed. “Wait a second. Are you _Steve_?”

“Yes, he’s Steve,” Sam said helpfully. “ _That_ Steve. The one that bonded with your brother about four nights ago.” He grinned at Steve as if he’d actually done him a favour.

“You’re lucky that my arm’s injured, because otherwise I would leap over this counter and stab you in the _face_.”

Steve and Sam both took a step back, hands elevated. “Damn, that’s hot,” Sam muttered.

“Do you know what you’ve done to him, rejecting him like that?” Natasha’s eyes were green fire. There was absolutely nothing helpless about this Omega at all. “He’s been moping for _days_ , not eating, barely sleeping. Asking me what he did wrong, trying to remember if he’d used _Command_ on you to force you to bond! And here you are, treating my brother like trash, and you have the _audacity_ to ask if _I’m his bond mate_? If he didn’t care about you so much I’d pound you into paste.”

Sam swallowed. “Bond with me.”

Natasha turned to Sam, all the animosity of seconds before completely gone. She blinked up at him through her eyelashes. “Take me to dinner first?”

“Anywhere,” Sam said reverently. “You like Paris? We could have dinner in Paris.”

Steve didn’t hear Natasha’s response over the roaring of blood in his ears. Natasha must be the foster sister Bucky had been talking about. Bucky wasn’t bonded to anyone. Bucky hadn’t been eating or sleeping because he thought _Steve_ had rejected _him._ How was that even possible? “But he left!”

Natasha’s eyes were back on him in an instant. “Of course, he left! We were back on shift the next morning.”

Steve shook his head. “But he _left,_ ” he repeated. “And he didn’t even leave a note!”

That made Natasha pause. “He didn’t leave a note?”

“No. Nothing. Don’t you think I would’ve called him if he had?”

“That’s a really good point, actually,” Sam said. “I know Steve. If James had left a note he would’ve called.”

“Huh,” Natasha said, still puzzled. “He told me he had.”

“He’s still in the hospital,” Steve said, with a growing sense of excitement. _Gonna take care of you._ Maybe Bucky had actually meant what he’d said the night they’d bonded. Maybe he really did want Steve to be his bond mate even though he was a Beta. Hadn’t Bucky called him that? _My Beta?_ “I’ll go find him and ask him what happened.”

“That’s a great idea,” Sam agreed readily. “You go to Medical Imaging, and I’ll keep Natasha company until you get back, let the charge nurse know you’re on break.”

“Thanks, Sam,” Steve said. He was feeling almost giddy with the thought that everything he’d believed about Bucky not wanting him had been wrong. He was bonded to the sexiest, kindest, most respectful Alpha on the planet who actually seemed to want him, too. He couldn’t believe he’d gotten so lucky.

Which was precisely when his luck ran out.

“Steve, Sam, don’t go anywhere,” Peggy said as she jogged over to the nursing station. “I’ve just received a call from the Fire Department. There’s been an accident at one of the building sites. Three traumas arriving in less than seven minutes.”

* * *

It took hours, but by the time two a.m. rolled around, all three of the injured workers had been stabilized and sent to the OR. Peggy’s team had done their best.

Wearily Steve went down to the basement to put his bloody scrubs into the hospital laundry and get back into his street clothes. He entered the changeroom and caught his reflection in the mirror over the sinks, startling at his appearance.

He’d been working so hard and been so focused on his patients that he’d actually forgotten he was bonded. Steve touched the mark, happiness washing through him as he thought of his bond mate.

The happiness immediately drained out of him. It was almost four a.m., nearly eleven hours since Bucky had been admitted. He would’ve finished his CT scan long ago and been discharged not soon after. For sure he’d left the hospital and gone back home, wherever that might be.

He’d have left knowing that he’d asked Steve to come see him, and Steve hadn’t gone. He’d still be thinking that Steve didn’t care. That their bond meant nothing.

Steve wiped at his eyes and straightened his shoulders. He might not know where Bucky was, but he _could_ find him. For sure Sam would’ve gotten Natasha’s contact information, and she’d probably be able to pass on Steve’s number if he asked nicely. Most likely. Maybe.

Steve shook off the negative thought. Natasha _would_ help him. Or he’d call up the NYPD and ask for Officer James Barnes. There were only 40 thousand New York cops. It wouldn’t be too hard to find him, would it? How many ‘James Barnes’ could possibly work for the NYPD? He sighed. Natasha would help. Steve was sure of it.

 _You could just access his medical file_ an evil voice in Steve’s head suggested. He shut it down immediately. It was absolutely unethical to look up the chart of someone who wasn’t his patient, no matter if they were bonded or not. He knew he wouldn’t do it. But maybe if Bucky had to come in for a follow-up appointment?

Steve scrubbed his face with his hands. His thoughts were whirring and he needed to just get himself changed and then go home. He went to his locker and put on his street clothes, feeling bone weary and about a hundred years old.

The subway ride home seemed to take hours. The summer sun was just beginning to crest over the Eastern edge of the city by the time Steve emerged from the underground, turning the windows of the buildings gold. He plodded up the three flights towards his apartment, trying to decide if he should text Sam before he went to sleep or after he woke up.

The warm scent of a campfire by a forest next to a lake wafted towards him, and his nostrils flared. He was instantly awake.

There was a man wearing blue basketball shorts, a loose red T-shirt and flip-flops propped up against the wall of the hallway. His legs were stretched out in front of him and his hands rested on his abdomen in a way that didn’t look at all comfortable. He was fast asleep.

There was a bouquet of wilting flowers on the floor beside him and a note held against his torso by his clasped hands:

 _Waiting for Steve. Please do not call 911_.

It was Bucky.

Steve chuckled, and then he was laughing and then the laugh turned a bit hysterical and he was crying. He went to the wall and sagged down, ending up sitting next to Bucky, their shoulders touching.

Bucky was smiling even before his eyes were fully opened. “Steve.”

“Hiya Buck,” Steve said, wiping at his eyes. He was laughing and crying at the same time, a product of his total exhaustion and overwhelming relief.

“Hey yourself,” Bucky said. His eyes were crinkled at the edges with happiness. “It’s good to see you.” Gently he reached over and stroked the tears off Steve’s face with the pads of his thumbs.

“It’s good to see you, too,” Steve said, heartfelt. He leaned into Bucky’s touch. It was incredible to see Bucky, actually. He’d never even dreamed that Bucky would just show up on his doorstep, just like that. Steve’s chest blossomed with warmth and he curled up closer. _My Alpha._ Then Bucky shifted and made a small noise of pain. Steve sat up, alarmed. “Your ribs! What the hell are you doing sitting on the floor?”

“It hurt to stand?” Bucky said, but he allowed Steve to haul him to his feet, wincing the entire time.

“You’re hurt,” Steve said as he slung Bucky’s arm over his shoulder to help him walk, flowers in his other hand. Steve was taller than the average Beta, but Bucky was just a bit taller. “You should be in bed.”

Bucky’s grin was filthy. “I thought you’d never ask.”

Steve blushed but he couldn’t help smiling. Bucky had come back for him. “My Alpha.”

“My Beta,” Bucky said, voice rumbling. “Take me inside.” There were two meanings to that sentence, and Steve wanted to obey both. His arrugia pulsed in agreement. Carefully he helped Bucky inside his apartment and put him down gently on his couch. He placed the flowers reverently on the kitchen counter. He couldn’t believe Bucky had gotten them for him.

Bucky kicked off his flip-flops and then settled back with a grimace. But when he looked at Steve he was smiling.

“You are so beautiful,” Steve said. His face heated.

Bucky chuckled, low and warm. “I don’t think anyone’s called me beautiful before. And I’m not. Not compared to an angel like you.”

Steve joined Bucky on the couch, being careful not to jostle him as he sat. “You really think I’m beautiful?”

“Like a Goddamn painting.” Bucky grinned. “I’ve never seen a Beta as hot as you.” But then his smile faded. “You’re gorgeous, and sexy as hell, and you’re also super smart and so caring…I saw the way you were in the hospital yesterday. You treated me so gently even though I know you don’t want to be bonded with me. You’re a really good guy, Steve. Way outta my league.”  

Steve’s blush deepened, but this time it was from shame. He remembered the way Natasha berated him for rejecting Bucky, even though he’d been sure it’d been the other way around. “Of course I want to be bonded with you. How could you possibly think otherwise?”

Bucky’s grin went pained. “You never called me. And then you weren’t too friendly when I saw you at the hospital. All that animosity can give a fella ideas.”

“I totally would’ve called you!” Steve protested. “You never left me a note! I had no way of finding you until you showed up at the hospital.”

Bucky frowned. “I left you a note.”

“No, you didn’t.” Steve shook his head. “Bucky, I would’ve called. I promise.”

“I left you a note, I swear!” Bucky said, insistent. “I know I was pretty out of it from my rut, but after we bonded…well, let’s just say everything got really clear. I really wanted to see you again.”    

“But then why did you leave?” Steve’s voice was small. “You didn’t even say good-bye.”

“I had to go on shift,” Bucky said. “I’ve only been on the job for four years, which means I still don’t wanna piss anybody off. Trust me, all I wanted to do was stay in bed with you, but I had to go.” He slid his hand into Steve’s. “And I did say good-bye. It was in the note I left.”

“Okay. Maybe you did leave a note,” Steve said, still not entirely convinced. “Where?”

“In the kitchen by the fruit bowl.”

Steve blinked. He had a sudden memory of madly cleaning every surface in his house. “Was it on yellow paper?”

“Yeah!” Bucky’s face lit up. “So, you found it?”

“Kind of? I think I might’ve thrown it out without realizing what it was.”

“Oh my God, and here we’ve both been thinking we didn’t want each other, all because you threw out the note!” Bucky laughed then winced, holding his sore ribs. “Ow.”

“Don’t laugh, it’ll hurt.” Steve put his hands gently on Bucky’s chest. Their eyes met, and the warmth in Bucky’s gaze shifted to something infinitely hotter.

“I want you, Steve,” he said. “I know we barely know each other, but you’re mine. Mine for life, and I don’t have any plans on changing that.” He stroked his fingers along Steve’s bond mark, making him shudder. “It may have been a mistake, me forgetting my suppressants, but it wasn’t any mistake me bonding with you. I’d do it again in a heartbeat.”

“Me too,” Steve said softly. He couldn’t look away from Bucky’s heated stare.

“Kiss me, angel,” Bucky murmured.

Steve leaned forward and pressed his mouth against Bucky’s. The seam of Bucky’s lips immediately opened and Steve let his tongue roam inside, tasting him. It was like brown sugar and cinnamon. Spicy and smoky and sweet all at once and Steve couldn’t help the moan that came deep in his throat.

Bucky’s hands moved up under Steve’s T-shirt, stroking the lines of his back and running alone the edges of his spine. “So Goddamn beautiful,” he whispered against Steve’s the tender place between Steve’s jaw and his neck. “So sweet. I swear I’m gonna lick every part of you. Find out how sweet you are.” He moved as if he wanted to tip Steve backwards, but then sagged back. “Fuck.”

“Ribs hurting?”

Bucky’s smile was rueful. “I think we’re gonna have to take it easy for a while.”

“Maybe you have to,” Steve said seductively. “But I don’t.” So, saying, he moved off the couch until he was kneeling on the floor between Bucky’s legs. He hooked his fingers around the waist band of Bucky’s shorts and looked up at him through his eyelashes. “Help me?”

Bucky shifted so that Steve could slide off his shorts and briefs. Bucky was already hard, his penis standing straight up from his groin, tip glistening. It was just as large as Steve remembered, but this time he had no fear. He licked his lips. “I’ve never done this.”

“Sweet Jesus,” Bucky breathed. “I’m your first for this, too?”

“Uh huh, so you’ll have to tell me if you like it.” Steve said, giving it an experimental lick. It tasted like the rest of Bucky smelled; smoky and sharp and clean. Bucky groaned, his penis twitching towards Steve’s mouth.

“That’s good. Keep doing that.”

Steve smirked, and licked it again, this time from the space in front of Bucky’s balls all the way to the tip. Bucky’s hips jerked, so Steve did it again, and again until Bucky gently put his hands in his hair to stop him. “Put your mouth around it,” Bucky said, voice thick. “That feels real good. I’ll like it. I promise.”

Steve remembered from when Bucky had done it for him the night they’d bonded. He took Bucky into his mouth, hollowing his cheeks as he sucked. Bucky moaned, sculpted abdominal muscles tightening. Steve lowered his mouth further, trying to see how far in he could take his bond mate. He swallowed, feeling Bucky’s cock against the back of his throat. It felt like he was choking and his eyes watered, but he really wanted to do this. Wanted to make Bucky feel as good as he’d felt.

“Oh my God,” Bucky’s breath hitched. “That feels so good. So good, angel. Love fucking your mouth like this. Love watching you go down on me. So fucking hot.”

Steve reveled in the praise Bucky was lavishing on him. It was a huge turn on to hear how much Bucky liked what he was doing. He shifted uncomfortably, trying to find more space for his hardened prick.

Bucky was thrusting gently but insistently into Steve’s mouth. “You keep sucking me like that, I’m gonna cum.”

“You want to cum like that?” Steve asked as he pumped Bucky’s cock. “I’ll swallow, I don’t mind.” Another thing he’d never done before, but Bucky made him want to try everything.

Bucky laughed. “You are so perfect. C’mere.” Obediently Steve rose up until he could see Bucky’s face. Bucky stroked his hand through his hair. “Now, what I want you to do,” he said, voice low and sultry, “is take off all your clothes, then I want you to climb aboard my cock and ride me until you cum. Think you can do that?” 

Steve gulped, hands already fumbling at his zipper. “Yes, Alpha.”

Bucky leaned forward just enough to pull off his T-shirt before laying back, wincing like before. The bruising on his chest had spread and darkened. It looked really painful. Steve’s prick sagged a little at the sight. “Oh, Buck…”

“Don’t worry about it,” Bucky said. “I’ve had way worse in the army, trust me.” He opened his arms. “C’mere.”

Steve didn’t move. “I don’t want to hurt you.”

“I trust you,” Bucky said with complete sincerity. “And I really wanna fuck you. So c’mere.”

“Buck,” Steve protested again. “Your ribs.”

Bucky chuckled. “You’re really worried about me, aintcha?” He reached out and tugged Steve’s pants and underwear down until they slid to the ground on their own and Steve could step out of them. He grasped Steve’s hip with his right hand, pulling him closer and sliding his hand between Steve’s legs, fingertips finding his opening. “Look how wet you are,” he said, slipping his fingers into Steve’s arrugia. “You’re so ready for me, but you’re trying to be good. Trying to keep me safe.”

Steve whimpered as Bucky entered him with two fingers, sliding them up and down inside him, stimulating the sensitive flesh. “I’m heavy,” Steve panted. “Too heavy for a Beta. I’ll hurt you.”

Bucky’s clever fingers stopped moving and Steve whined with the sudden cessation of sensation. “Too heavy? What the fuck’re you talking about?”

“For a Beta,” Steve gasped. Bucky’s fingers were still deep inside him, still making Steve feel incredible. He thrust his hips forward, trying to get the delicious friction back. “I’m too big for a Beta. I look like an Alpha. Betas shouldn’t look like me.”

 Bucky growled, a noise that sounded more angry than sexy. “That’s bullshit! Who the _fuck_ told you that?”

Steve blinked at the vehemence in Bucky’s tone. “Everyone. Everyone. All the time.”

“Well, they’re wrong,” Bucky said in the same angry tone. “Everyone is completely and utterly fucking _wrong._ You are the most beautiful and perfect Beta I’ve ever seen and I’ll kill anyone who ever says different.” He thrust his fingers into Steve again, harder and faster than before, his anger still evident. It felt _amazing_ and Steve let his head fall back, riding the building waves of pleasure. Bucky thought he was beautiful. He really, really meant it. Maybe Steve wasn’t ugly after all.

“Get on my cock.” Bucky’s expression brooked no argument.

“Yes Alpha,” Steve said. Bucky removed his fingers and Steve gingerly climbed onto the couch and straddled Bucky’s hips before lowering himself carefully onto Bucky’s penis, watching his Alpha for any sign of pain.

Bucky’s eyes closed, his hands gripping Steve’s hips. “Fuck, you feel so fucking good.”

“So do you,” Steve breathed. “What should I do?”

“Move,” Bucky said. “Just move your beautiful body until it feels right. I swear I’ll like it.”

Steve nodded and started to move. It was easier than he thought to find a rhythm that felt good. He shifted himself forwards and back, feeling the pleasurable glide of Bucky’s penis deep inside him, the way the base of his prick and his testicles caught on the muscular ridges of Bucky’s lower abs. He watched Bucky as he moved. Bucky’s eyes were still closed, his face contorted as his penis was rubbed by the walls of Steve’s arrugia. “Fuck, Stevie,” he moaned. “That’s perfect. You’re perfect. Keep doing that. Keep my cock inside you like that. So fucking deep.”

Once again Steve wondered if the Omegas who’d ridden him like this had felt quite as good as he felt riding Bucky. Sex before had been great, but being with Bucky took it to a whole new level. He knew he’d never want to have sex with anyone else for the rest of his life.

His orgasm took him by surprise. One second he was chasing after his release, grinding down on Bucky’s hipbones, and the next his prick was spurting cum onto Bucky’s stomach and his arrugia was clenching down hard on Bucky’s cock. There was nothing in his head but the white-hot feeling of intense pleasure. He cried out: “Alpha!”

“I’m here,” Bucky grunted. He held Steve’s hips tightly, his thrusts become more erratic until he stiffened, fingers pressing hard enough to bruise as he came.

Steve continued to move his hips, reveling in the small aftershocks the movement created.

“Fuck, that was amazing,” Bucky wheezed. “You’re amazing. And you need to get off. My ribs are fucking killing me.”

Steve jumped off. “Jesus. Buck! I knew we shouldn’t have done that!”

“Worth it.” Bucky grinned at Steve’s horrified expression. He held out his hand and Steve helped him to sit. “What time is it?”

Steve sat beside him, sides pressed together. “Around seven a.m.”

“Jesus. You haven’t been to bed yet, have you?”

“It’s not like you got any good quality sleep in the hallway.”

“Yeah,” Bucky agreed. “I’m fucking wiped. Waiting for your bond mate to get a clue is exhausting.”

Steve playfully bopped him on the shoulder. “I’m worth waiting for.” He’d meant it as a joke, but the look Bucky gave him was anything but.

“Yeah,” he said roughly, “you are.”

They sat, still naked, just looking at each other. Tentatively, Bucky reached out and gently traced the oval of Steve’s bond mark. “You okay about this?” His forehead was creased with concern.

“Yeah,” Steve answered softly. He caught Bucky’s hand, holding it tightly in his. “I’m really glad I met you, Buck. I’m glad we bonded. It wasn’t what I was expecting when I brought you home, but I’m glad we did.”

“Me too,” Bucky said. He cupped Steve’s cheek. “I wanna be a good partner for you. I wanna be the best Alpha. Someone worthy of a Beta as incredible as you.”

Steve’s face heated under Bucky’s praise. “I think you’re pretty incredible yourself.”

Bucky grinned. “I’m just a dumb cop. You could do way better.”

“No,” Steve answered seriously. “You’re smart. And respectful. And so kind.” He swallowed, forcing himself to meet Bucky’s gaze. He took both Bucky’s hands in his. “You’ll make a great father, Buck.”

Bucky’s eyes narrowed in puzzlement, and then widened with sudden comprehension. He gave Steve the half-smile that Steve had already grown to love. “Are you telling me you’re _pregnant?_ ”

“I could be. I went into sympathetic heat, and then we knotted, so it’s possible. The doctor says I won’t know for about three more weeks. But I could be.”

“Sympathetic heat, huh? We’re meant to be together.” Bucky put his hand on Steve’s abdomen, his smile was filled with awe. “Pregnant. How about that.”

“You don’t mind?” Steve asked, hating how unsure he felt.

“Hell no.” Bucky exclaimed, grinning broadly. “I’ve always wanted to be a dad. And I can’t imagine a parent better than you.” But then his expression clouded. “I’m a cop, Stevie. And I was in the army before that. I’ve seen some bad shit. I’m worried it’s going to cause problems for our pups.”

 _Our pups._ Steve loved the way that sounded. Bucky wanted children. Wanted _him_ , and Steve wanted Bucky in return. But he understood Bucky’s fear. “It’s hard to do the jobs we do and not be affected by it. But we’ll help each other. Work together. I promise.”

Bucky’s smile was back. “I like that.”

“And I’m STI-free,” Steve added. “I probably should’ve told you that before we had unprotected sex.” He left out the _again._

“Oh yeah, me too,” Bucky said readily. “I got tested the day after we bonded.” He rubbed his hand over his face. “God, I’m such a dick, ain’t I? Never even thought about condoms this time.” But then he smiled. “But then again, if I already got you pregnant…”

His grin was so smug that Steve had to laugh. “Don’t be so proud of yourself. We didn’t knot this time. And I don’t know if I'm pregnant yet, either.”

Bucky squeezed Steve’s hands. “Would it bother you if I kind of hope you are?”

“No,” Steve said honestly. He finally knew how he felt. “I kind of hope that, too.”

They sat like that, still naked, still holding hands as the warm sunlight dappled the room.  Steve yawned, realizing he was completely exhausted. “God, I could sleep for a week.”

Bucky rubbed the back of his neck. “I know we don’t know each other very well yet, but would you mind if I crashed here?”

“You could be the father of my child,” Steve grinned at him. “Yeah, I think that’d be okay.”

* * *

‘Hey, Stevie!” Bucky called from the front hall. “I’m back!”

Steve quickly wiped his hands on the towel in the bathroom and splashed water on his face to hide his tears. He jammed the thin stick into his back pocket. “Coming!” 

Steve had moved in with Bucky and Natasha as soon as they both realized that cops made more money than nurses and therefore Bucky’s place was larger and in a better neighbourhood. Natasha was a great roomate, and was becoming a great friend, too. It was obvious why Bucky loved her. She spent all her free time with Sam however, so it was almost like Steve and Bucky had the place to themselves.

So far, living as a bonded pair had been way easier than Steve had ever imagined. Bucky was decent and respectful down to his core. But he was also kind and smart and was the type of funny that Steve loved. His taste in music wasn’t great, and his taste in clothes was exactly like someone who normally wore a uniform. But otherwise, Bucky was perfect. And strangely enough, he thought Steve was, too.

“Hey Buck.” Steve smiled as he came into the living room. “How’d the run go. Any pain?”

“Hi, angel.” Bucky grinned at him and bounded over for a quick kiss. “Run went great. Side twinged a little, but the doc says that’s normal until I’m totally healed. She’s cleared me for duty next set.” He leaned in to kiss Steve again. “I’d hug you but I’m sweaty and gross.”

Steve hugged him anyway, licking over Bucky’s scent gland, loving the way he tasted. Bucky quivered. “Keep that up and I’m gonna take you right here.”

“I wouldn’t mind, Alpha,” Steve purred. Bucky meant the world to him, and he would take every opportunity to let him know.

Bucky laughed and stroked his hair. “My Beta. Give me a minute, ‘kay? I gotta answer this text from Tash. Sam finally asked her to bond with him!”

“Finally!” Steve said with enthusiasm. Sam and Natasha were great together.

“They’re holding a barbeque tomorrow to celebrate. You in?”

“Absolutely, but we have to buy them a cheese tray first.”

“Cheese tray. Got it.” Bucky keyed his phone and then dropped it on the coffee table. He pulled Steve into his arms. “Where were we?” They kissed.

Steve’s mouth opened immediately. Bucky tasted sugar-sweet and Steve would never get enough. He moaned deep in his throat, his hands roaming up Bucky’s back.

Bucky pulled back. “Angel?”

Steve tilted his head. “Buck?”

“You okay? You smell different. And you taste…” He licked his lips. “More fruity?”

Steve couldn’t hold it in any longer. “I’m pregnant.”

Bucky gave Steve his half-smile. “For real?”

Steve pulled out the test strip from his back pocket. It showed two parallel blue lines, and it was one of the most beautiful things Steve had ever seen. “For real.”

“Holy shit,” Bucky breathed, then; “holy shit!” he shouted. “We’re gonna be dads!”

“I know,” Steve beamed. “I know!”

“This is amazing!” Bucky was cradling the test in his hands like it was already a pup. “Oh my God Stevie, you’ve made me so happy. This is incredible.” He started to cry.

Steve took the test from his hands and put it down on the table. He pulled his bond mate into his arms, feeling his own eyes start to well. “I know.”  

“I wanted this.” Bucky cried against his shoulder. “From the second you told me you might be pregnant, I’ve wanted it to be true. Oh God, Stevie. You’ve made me so happy. You really are an angel.”

“I love you,” Steve said, tears coursing down his cheeks. “My Alpha. I love you.”

“Gonna take care of you,” Bucky said fervently. “I love you, too. You and the pup, both. More than my own life. I love you. My Beta.” And then they were kissing frantically, tearing at each other’s clothes in a desperate attempt to get naked as fast as possible.

Bucky’s gym clothes came off more easily than Steve’s T-shirt and shorts, but finally they were both naked, Steve on his back on the couch, and Bucky over him, spreading his legs wide.

“You good, Stevie?” Bucky panted, the head of his cock lined up with Steve’s entrance.

“Alpha!” Steve whined in response, “ _Command_ me, please!”

“Oh, fuck. Yeah I can do that. You’d better be wet and ready for me,” he said, voice low and dripping with _Command_. “Because I’m gonna slam my cock in you so hard you’re gonna see stars.”

Steve’s legs were instantly damp with his slick. “Do it,” Steve begged. “Alpha!” Bucky thrust into him, starting a hard rhythm that was right on the edge of pain. Steve moaned, lifting his hips to meet Bucky’s thrusts. His prick was standing straight out from his groin, tip leaking.

Bucky grasped Steve’s prick with one hand and started stroking. “Want you to cum,” he growled. “Wanna feel you around me when you do. Can you do that for me, Stevie?”

“Yes, Alpha,” Steve whimpered. He was so close.

“You gonna cum for me?” Bucky _Commanded._ Steve nodded, beyond speech. “Then do it.”.

Steve came, crying out in pleasure with his release. His prick spurted over Bucky’s hands as his arrugia spasmed around Bucky’s cock, his whole body shaking.

Bucky came moments later, shuddering over Steve before collapsing on him and nuzzling Steve’s scent gland. “That was fucking amazing. Bond you again, if I could.”

Steve rubbed his back, feeling warm and content from the afterglow. “I love you.”

“I love you, too, angel.” Bucky raised himself up just enough so he could see Steve’s eyes. “Hey, doing that isn’t going to hurt the pup, is it?”

“No,” Steve smiled at him. “Peggy says that pups in utero actually enjoy orgasms. It’s like riding waves in the ocean.”

“Well, we should do it more often, then,” Bucky grinned. “Gotta keep our little girl happy.”

Steve raised his eyebrows. “Little girl, huh?”

“Yup,” Bucky lay back down so his head was on Steve’s chest. “A beautiful little girl with blond hair and blue eyes, like her daddy.”

Steve smiled at the fanciful description. “I hope’s got dark hair like you. I hope she’s an Alpha.”

“No, blond,” Bucky said. “And an Alpha would be okay. But I’d prefer her to be an Omega. Like her aunt.”

Steve smiled at the idea of their daughter, a small and fierce Omega just like Natasha. “That sounds pretty great.”      

 “Yeah,” Bucky said. “But the best? The best would her being a Beta. Just like you.”

Steve sighed with complete happiness, heart full of joy. “Okay.”

END  


End file.
